Looking for curves in all the wrong places...

Princess was recently found to have Scoliosis and we're scheduled to see a pediatric orthopedist in May. Since her 30 degree curvature is considered "moderate", I'm pretty sure the doctor will recommend a back brace.

Unfortunately, a brace won't ever make her spine straight. It only keeps the curve from increasing, so she may still need surgery someday.

I do know a little bit about Scoliosis, having watched my brother suffer from it in his youth. I remember helping strap the brace on him, pushing against a chair so that we could pull the straps as tight as possible. It looked like a hard plastic corset... a torture device. Especially since you generally have to sleep in the thing, ugh!

He did have fun with the brace on occasion, however. He liked to talk people into gently punching his chest, and watch their expressions as they frantically withdrew their crumpled fist in obvious surprise (we called him "The Man of Steel"). But it did take away the fun of dropping ice cubes down the back of his shirt.

That was in a colder clime, though, and I wonder how much more torturous it will be here in the Texas heat. Particularly bothersome is that I can't explain any of this to her, since she has no clue what I'm saying, so she will think that we are purposely being mean.

Since that old Waylon Jennings song is in my head, I'll rewrite it a bit...
I was looking for curves in all the wrong places,
Looking for orthopedic back braces,
Searching your X-rays, looking for traces
Of what.. I'm dreaming of...
Hopin' to find a doc who's not a heel
God bless the day I can reveal
A straight spine for the girl I love.

Monkey Business

It's amazing what the Three Monkeys can do when banished to the back yard with only a rope and some PVC pipe... they created their own zipline. They even positioned the hammock seat as a landing pad, and are planning to set up some kind of water feature to land in.

I have to admire their creativity. Even MacGyver would be proud. I'm sure it breaks every safety rule in the book, but danged if it didn't give me enough time to take a hot shower. So I'll let them keep it in place for now... until their father sees it and wants to take a turn!

Their rope burns will heal. Not so sure about the skull fractures, but who would notice?

Great Expectations

Why is it that kids want to play with obscure items that aren't "real" toys? You know, like when you give them a big Christmas gift and they would rather play with the box? My Three Monkeys are very much that way. Alas, my Princess seems to be of that same mindset. We have all kinds of pacifiers, teething rings, dolls, blocks, and other toys for her chewing / teething pleasure... but she prefers socks. Socks!

It reminds me of a little dog we used to have who loved to hoard socks. We wondered why so many socks were missing that we could never put together a matching pair. We assumed that the dryer must be some kind of wormhole to an alternate universe, which seemed to attract socks for whatever reason. Then we discovered the "nest" of socks under the bed... and the guilty pup snoring atop her mound of treasure.

I suppose it could be worse - a preference for underwear, for example. Nevertheless, Princess was *supposed* to teethe on the crystal-encrusted rattle we bought her. And that brings us back to Parenting Lesson #1: Never have pre-conceived expectations for your children! They will do everything they can to flaunt it in your face.

Now, if you'll excuse me, I have some socks to wash...

Boys Will Be... Barbarians?

I'll be honest -- I don't understand little boys one bit. Mine must be direct descendants of Genghis Khan or something, because there is not a drop of civility in their little bodies.

They share a bathroom, which I avoid entering unless equipped with full BioHazard gear. This is what I saw when I walked in there yesterday.

Yes, that is a bathmat in the sink, sopping wet, with bubbles on it (notice the completely empty soap bottle nearby?)

Granted, this is one of their "cleaner" messes. Having cleaned up many different mediums, such as mud, various bodily fluids, paint, etc, I guess water and soap should be considered some kind of progress. Perhaps someday they will actually use the sink, soap, and mat for the true purposes in which they were intended. A mom can dream...

Joining the Technological Age

I have finally given in to peer pressure and started a blog of my own. All my friends have one. My brother has one. My doctor's cousin's dog's vet's stockbroker has one. Apparently, I am behind the times.

As a mother of four - yes, four - I have plenty of fodder to blog about.

Three of my children are boys. Snips, snails, puppy dog tails... screws, wrenches, buckets of nails... the whole bit. My "3 Monkeys".

My fourth child is a true princess through and through. Only ten months old, she has struggled with health issues of torticollis, plagiocephaly, and now scoliosis.

There is certainly never a dull moment around here!